The Script of My Life: Act One

And, no, this is not in proper screenplay format...thanks to blogger

INT. BEDROOM IN A CONTEMPORARY IRISH COUNTRY HOME – DARK BEFORE DAWN

All is still. LORY and BRENDAN, a couple approaching middle age, sleep peacefully in their bed. Only occasional SNORING lets us know that the lumps under the sheets are human. The digital alarm clock reads 5:45.

In between SNORES, tiny, footie-pyjama FOOTSTEPS are heard approaching from the hall. The door is slammed open, reverberating off the wardrobe. MAX, a small, gorgeous toddler of 2 years and some odd months, scrambles into the bedroom and over to Lory’s side of the bed. He slams the side of her face repeatedly with his pudgy little fist.

MAX
Wake up, mammy! Wake up, mammy! Wake up, mammy!


CUT TO

INT. KITCHEN – SAME HOUSE – STILL NOT DAWN
Lory leans against the kitchen counter, drinking coffee. She is dishevelled, yawning and puffy eyed. RADIO 1 is on in the background. ZACH, almost 5, enters from the hall. He has just woken. He squints in the bright glare of the kitchen spotlights.

ZACH
Mom, I’m huuungry. I’m huuungry. Can I have a chocolate biscuit?

LORY
No

ZACH
Why?

LORY
It’s 6:30 in the morning. No biscuits in the morning.

ZACH
Why?

LORY
Because.

ZACH
Because why?

LORY
Because, I want you to be healthy.

ZACH
Biscuits aren’t healthy?

LORY
Not so much.

ZACH
Then what can I have?

LORY
Breakfast.

ZACH
Can I have biscuits for breakfast?

Lory rolls her eyes. Max runs in from the living room, blankie in one hand and half empty Avent bottle of milk in the other.

MAX
It’s Dora! It’s Dora! The purple bear chase Dora!

Lory picks him up and plants a kiss on his check.


INT. HALLWAY MORNING
An hour later, Zach is dressed in a school uniform, clutching a lunchbox. Brendan is by the closet, looking for his coat.

ZACH
What did you put in my lunchbox?

LORY
Cheese cubes and crackers and a fruit smoothie and water.

ZACH
(Whining)
But I wanted a toasted sandwich.

LORY
Toasted sandwich? I’ll make you one tomorrow.

ZACH
But I wanted one today.

LORY
It’s too late. I’m not making another lunch, honey. Just eat that one.

ZACH
But Carl got a toasted sandwich yesterday.

LORY
Who’s Carl?

From downstairs, LOUD YELLING:

MAX
JUICE! Hey! Hey! JUUUUUIIIICE! Mammy! MAAAAAAAAAAAAM! JUICE!

LORY
I gotta go. I’ll pick you up at the usual time. Tomorrow, I promise, toasted sandwich, just like Carl.

INT. BATHROOM – MIDDAY
Max lies on the changing mat on the bathroom counter. He smiles, big and wide. Lory undoes his diaper. Her eyes water and she wrinkles her nose.

LORY
Jaysus, what have I been feeding you? The stink...

MAX
I make the poo.

LORY
Yes, you do...and lots of it, too.

EXT. THE DRIVEWAY - LATER 
Lory is trying to get Max in the car. He is clinging to the frame of the back seat door, ripping the rubber seal off the edge with a firm little grip.

MAX
No!!!!

LORY
C’mon, Max. We have to go get Zach from school. Let go of the door.

MAX
No!!! Outside I go outside!!!

LORY
(Struggling to pry his fingers off the door frame and buckle him into his car seat)
Max...please....we’re going to be late to collect Zach from school

MAX
(Throwing the blankie onto the driveway)
NO!!!! Blankie!
(He cries, capitulating. Lory straps him into his seat and hands him the blankie)
Oh, no, mami, the blankie is dirty...

LORY
That’s because you threw it on the floor!

Max cries. Lory takes the blankie and brushes it off.

LORY
Look, it’s OK. Mammy cleaned it.

She hands it back.

EXT. SCHOOLYARD – AFTERNOON
Lory is walking Zach across the parking lot and to the car.

LORY
What did you do in school today?

ZACH
Nothing.

LORY
You must have done something.

ZACH
I can’t remember

LORY
You just walked out of the classroom.

ZACH
We coloured

LORY
Just colouring? What else? You were there for 4 hours.

ZACH
I don’t know...is there a snack for me in the car?

LORY
You and the food

They arrive at the old hatchback. Lory opens the door, Zach gets in and she buckles him in.

INT. CAR - SAME
Max is sleeping in his baby seat. Lory gets into the driver's seat, buckles her seatbelt, puts the key in the ignition, turns it, and...nothing.

LORY
Shit.

ZACH
What did you say??

She purses her lips.

LORY
Shasta

END ACT 1